Her Heart's Divide Read online

  An hour later, we sat around the dining room table, staring at the remains of two frozen pizzas and a six-pack of beer.

  “So that’s it, babe,” said Ryan. “As far as we can tell, the only thing different about this world is that I married you instead of Jack, and he married Allison two years later. Everything else is the same, down to the expansion I want to put on the shop.”

  “And the BS I’m dealing with at the factory level,” Jack said with a grimace.

  “Seriously? Everything is exactly the same?”

  Ryan tipped up his beer to get the last drop before replying. “Not entirely the same. There are different colors and models in the showroom, and it seems that in Jack’s memory we’re carrying a bigger sedan inventory than we are right now.”

  “Ha!” I said. “Just like I’ve been saying we should for ages.”

  Jack smirked. “Well, in this world I only have to listen to you saying it during the day. In mine I had to listen to you saying it all night too, so I gave in faster over there.”

  All three of us cracked up.

  “So you’re henpecked! She doesn’t nag me, old buddy. I must be doing something right.” Ryan laughed.

  “You just naturally do whatever I want you to do,” I said sweetly.

  Ryan nodded, and then his eyes widened. “Hey!”

  That convulsed us again. We eventually grew calm, and for a while we listened to the cicadas sing.

  Jack broke the silence. “Has anyone called Allison yet?”

  “She’s in Sedona, Jack. Something about planets aligning with magnets, or whatever.” I tried not to sound like I was making fun of my best friend, but she and I had long since come to an agreement that we wouldn’t talk about some of her hobbies. I wasn’t one for believing in anything that I couldn’t see, and Allison, well, she said things like “crystal aura” without irony.

  He sighed. “I shouldn’t be relieved, but I am. Why didn’t I go with her?”

  “There’s no cell-phone reception there, and you had too much going on this week to risk being out of touch.”

  “That’s an understatement. If things are as similar as Ryan thinks, I need to go back in tomorrow.”

  “On a Sunday?”

  “Yeah. I want to get in there early too, so I’d better catch some sleep.” He hesitated for a moment. “Would you guys mind if I crashed here? I’m not entirely sure where I live, and it would feel weird, anyway.”

  “Sure, buddy,” said Ryan. “I’ll take you to your house tomorrow.”

  “You want to wash your clothes tonight?” I asked.

  He shook his head. “I’m not planning to meet with any customers. As long as no one gets too close, I’m fine.”

  The men turned the futon from a couch to a mattress while I fetched the sheets and pillows. We made up the bed with the ease of old friends long accustomed to working together. But we stared at one another like strangers when we were done.

  “Well. Good night, then,” I said.

  Chapter Four

  Safely in our bedroom, I leaned into my husband’s embrace with relief. “What the hell is going on, Ry?”

  “I don’t know, babe. He seems fine, except that he really believes you two live here, and that it’s me who practically lives here on weekends instead of him and Allison.”

  “It can’t be true.”

  “I don’t see how it can be, but that doesn’t make it a lie.”

  I stared at him. “If it’s not true, how is it not a lie?”

  Ryan didn’t answer for a minute and kept stroking my hair. “Well, a lie is something you say even when you know the truth is something different. I think Jack’s telling the truth as he sees it. Plus, he’s never lied to either of us, ever.”

  “Then he’s crazy. You can’t erase the last seven years like that.”

  He chuckled. “You never wonder how things might have gone if you made a different choice?”

  “Seems like a waste of time to…” My hot-tub fantasy sprang to mind, and I felt something twitch deep inside of me. “Okay, sure, everyone wonders now and again, but you don’t dwell on it if you’ve got your act together, and you don’t rewrite seven years of history.”

  “Probably not. I just know that what he’s saying is impossible, and that he never, ever lies. So either he’s crazy, or we are, or something’s going on that I can’t see.” He took off his shirt, revealing the tight abs and pectorals of a man who works with his muscles every day. I whistled in appreciation and he winked.

  “You are a gorgeous, gorgeous man.”

  “Glad you think so, Mrs. Crosse.”

  With our teeth brushed and all the other parts of the bedtime routine finished, we got into bed and looked out the picture window at the stars. The moon hadn’t yet risen, so I could barely see the outlines of the furniture on the part of the deck that ran outside our bedroom. I lay on my side, with my head pillowed on my husband’s strong arm. His crisp chest hair was a tactile joy, and I ran my free hand through it in slow circles. Occasionally I let my fingers wander down the trail to his taut belly and then combed them back upward. My hand seemed so small against the broad expanse of his torso. I felt him relax under my touch.

  “Mmm. That’s nice.”

  “I love your chest hair. I have no idea what I saw in all those hairless poster boys I hung on my walls in high school.”

  “Your husband Jack doesn’t have much chest hair,” he teased.

  I sniffed. “You’re not funny.”

  “I’m very funny. You laugh at my jokes all the time.”

  “That’s just to make you feel like a big man.”

  “I am a big man.”

  “Don’t brag.” My hand brushed over his underpants, and I felt him stir. “Okay, you’re not really bragging if you’re being descriptive.”

  His laugh was low and sent a shiver through me. “You say the nicest things to me, Lila.” He reached over and traced a line down my ribs, into the valley of my waist and up over my hip.

  I sighed. “Now, that’s nice.”

  The calluses on his hand added a dimension to his tender exploration that I’d never felt with any other lover. Long, smooth strokes over my back, with small circles from his thumb added to my enjoyment.

  “It’s too bad I can’t purr,” I whispered.

  “Those little soft noises you make when I’m petting you are just as good,” he whispered back.

  I’m not a slow woman when it comes to hints. I hummed and sighed my appreciation as he ministered to my body. I could hear him catch his breath, and his body was shifting ever so slightly whenever he got close to some important part of me. I didn’t stop touching him, but I made the touch more delicate and used the tips of my fingernails as I traced his nipples. The moon finally rose above the trees, and I could see his perfect body in all its details.

  “God, I love you,” he said. He turned onto his side, facing me, and propped his head on his bent arm. With his free hand, he nudged me over until I was lying on my back. He used a single finger to draw spirals and circles, arrows and waves. Never quite touching my nipples, and grazing over my panties, he still focused all of my attention on those sensitive spots.

  I reached out for him. He bent his head down and touched his lips to mine. Our mouths came open at the same time and our warm tongues met. His kiss was slow and deep. I had to remind myself to breathe.

  We wrapped our arms around each other. He put one leg over mine and pulled me closer. I felt how hard he’d become. The thought and the feeling rushed through me, and I kissed him a little more fiercely. One of his hands slid in between our chests, and he cupped one of my breasts with his thumb firmly pressing the button of my nipple. I gasped, arching my back to press myself into his hand a little harder. “I love you too.”

  He sat up. Both of his hands went to my breasts and then down my sides onto my thighs, over and over. He continued to avoid doing more than graze the lace covering my mound, and I moaned in happy frustration. More leisurely kisses
on my mouth and my throat felt so good that I shut my eyes, though they flew open when I felt his hot breath between my legs. He nibbled at the outline of my vaginal lips through the cloth.

  “You like this?”

  “I like everything you do.”

  “You need to be more specific.” He nibbled a little harder, the stubble on his chin rough on my inner thigh.

  “I like that. I like how warm that feels.” I cried out when he tweaked a nipple at the same time that he pushed on my swelling clit.

  He moved his mouth up my body and slid his hand back down between my legs. I was moving back and forth a little, my knees coming apart without any conscious thought. Our kiss became urgent, and I reached down to feel his smooth hardness shoving through the opening in his underwear.

  “These aren’t doing us any good,” he said, snapping the elastic of my panties. I raised my hips off the bed so he could slide the underwear off. I sat up and reached for his waistband with eager fingers. He ran his hands over my hair as I helped him strip down.

  His cock was gorgeous. It was long, with a smooth head that begged me to lean over and give it a lick. I did, and at his moan, I circled it with my tongue. I relaxed my jaw the way Ryan had taught me years ago and took him in as deeply as I could manage. My hands were on the base of his penis, controlling the depth, and I used my fingers on the soft pouch of his balls.

  “Uhhhhh. Oh, Lila. That’s amazing,” he moaned. He put his hands back to brace himself.

  I took my mouth away for a moment. “Lie down and relax, babe.”

  He did, but he kept his hands on my hair with a light touch. I went slowly and smoothly, trying to excite him as much as possible without making him come.

  Something moved out on the deck. I froze.

  “No, Li, don’t stop, please.” I returned to my husband’s cock, but in my peripheral vision, I could see someone moving a deck chair to face the bedroom window. It was Jack.

  I felt a surge of wetness between my legs, and I sucked harder, making noises deep in my throat. I was about to come, but Ryan sensed it. He pushed me back gently. “How do you want it tonight?” he asked, staring into my eyes.

  In answer, I sat up and straddled his body. He helped position his perfect cock at the right angle, and I lowered myself down inch by delicious inch. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Jack arch his back as though he were the one impaling me.

  I began to move. Up and down, as slowly as I could manage. I put my fingertips into his mouth, and he sucked them until I felt my clit spasm. I traced my wet fingers over my nipples, pulling and tweaking until Ryan groaned in ecstasy. Jack’s mouth opened in a silent cry. My own control was breaking. I moved faster, rocking back and forth. Ryan put his hands over the tops of my thighs, up high by my hips, and placed his thumbs directly on my throbbing clit.

  “Ryan!” I cried out. I came in glorious waves, my insides contracting and shaking.

  His whole body was hard with tension. I thrust my body onto his as hard as I could, and his hands held my hips firmly when he arched his back to meet me. I felt him jerking deep inside me, and he called out my name as he came.

  I fell forward onto his broad chest, and we lay there panting. His heartbeat was powerful, thumping in time with my own. I looked outside. Jack lay sprawled in the chair with a small smile on his face.

  I turned my face away, feeling strange. When I looked back, he was gone.

  Chapter Five

  By the way the dappled sunlight played across the wall, I knew I’d slept much longer than usual. I stretched and winced a little. Parts of me were feeling a little tender, but recalling the ways they got that way made me smile.

  There was a note on my nightstand.

  My Li—

  You looked like an angel this morning. Good thing you were snoring or I wouldn’t have believed you were real.

  “I don’t snore—I inhale deeply,” I said to myself with a grin. His accusation of snoring and my response was a long-running joke between us.

  Jack and I put the living room back together and cleaned up the kitchen. We’re going by his place for clothes, and then I’m going to hit the errands since I’m out.

  Love you, babe.

  R.

  I flopped back and grinned at the ceiling. Living out in the sticks was wonderful most of the time, but tasks like going to the ATM and the hardware store tended to pile up until it was possible to blow half a day on picky little errands. For Ryan to do them for us was proof I’d married a real keeper.

  And I had to do my part for our team. I threw on some old clothes and grabbed a banana for breakfast on my way through the kitchen.

  Three hours later, I felt like my part had been a fair one. The shrubs were tamed, the flowerbeds contained my flowers and nothing else, and our gravel was all herded back onto the driveway. I was hot and sweaty, and the river looked inviting.

  No one was around. I peeled off my grubby gear, including the sweat-soaked bra and panties that had been chafing my tender bits, and jumped off the dock with my best rebel yell.

  Skinny-dipping is only sexy in company. Alone, I felt like a four-year-old whose mama forgot to bring a swimsuit to the picnic. I splashed and hollered with complete abandon. The sun beat down on my dark hair, so I did an underwater somersault to cool off. My eyes were closed in the murky water. I kept them closed and floated for a moment.

  I’d have stayed like that for hours if my stomach hadn’t growled. With a sigh, I flipped over to swim back to the dock.

  “I have half a mind to join you,” said Jack.

  I got a mouthful of river water when my jaw dropped. “What the hell? How long have you been there?” I spluttered.

  “Since you dove under the water.”

  “That’s swell. If this dealership thing doesn’t work out for you, there’s always a spying career waiting for you.”

  He snickered at me. “It’s not my fault if you were making enough noise to drown out a marching band.”

  “I thought you were going to be gone all day,” I said, trying to tread water and keep my entire torso hidden. It wasn’t possible, despite my best efforts.

  “Nope. Finished earlier than I thought.”

  “Are you planning to sit on that dock all day instead?”

  “Maybe.” He lifted an eyebrow at me. I could see him tracing the outline of my breasts with his eyes. A muscle in his jaw twitched, and he swallowed hard.

  I managed to get to the end of the dock and huddled next to it without getting out. “Maybe you can give me a little privacy.”

  “I have seen you naked, you know.”

  “Yeah,” I snapped, “outside my bedroom window.”

  He flushed. “You saw me?”

  “Yes, and you’re damned lucky I didn’t scream.”

  “I’m sorry, Lila, I—sorry,” he said. “I’m just going to head inside, if that’s okay.”

  “I’ll see you there,” I said with as much dignity as I could muster. As soon as he was halfway to the house, I hauled myself onto the dock. I used my bandanna as a makeshift towel until I was dry enough for my shirt and jeans.

  I went through the living room without looking at Jack, but my temper was cooler after I changed clothes. I still couldn’t resist poking at him a little.

  “Would you like anything for lunch? Sandwich? Cold pork chop? Binoculars to spy with?”

  “You know, I just thought of something,” he said. His face was serious, but his eyes crinkled up as though he were laughing.

  “What’s that?”

  “For someone who knew I was there, you were awfully uninhibited.”

  It was my turn to flush. “I…I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  He pursued the point. “At what point did you see me? I fully admit I was there. I’d gone onto the deck for some fresh air and I heard noises.”

  “And you went to investigate out of concern for my safety. Is there some kind of burglar who moans when he’s got his hands on the DVD player?”
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  “Sure, why not? All kinds of things turn people on. Like, say, being caught having sex.”

  “I don’t—I mean, I…” I gave up. “Fine. I saw you when you sat down.”

  “Thank you.”

  “Hope you got an eyeful, you disgusting Peeping Tom.”

  He grew serious. “Lila, I truly am sorry. I shouldn’t have done it, and I meant to walk away.”